tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-497703407839533517.post834462610938971549..comments2012-05-30T09:20:40.528-07:00Comments on Ellen's Blog: poem 8aEllenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01509992610214227472noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-497703407839533517.post-81783462416758505572012-05-29T17:53:40.427-07:002012-05-29T17:53:40.427-07:00I really enjoyed this poem, I have been in Lucky&#...I really enjoyed this poem, I have been in Lucky's when this has happened, so I knew the exact feeling. I thought it was also fun and kind of fast pace!Megan Lanhamhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01982108394919114350noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-497703407839533517.post-24680975198123843592012-05-22T07:32:23.649-07:002012-05-22T07:32:23.649-07:00Pretty solid, but there's a little too much te...Pretty solid, but there's a little too much telling, I think. Can you enrich the situation with more images? (I love the detail about the baseball cap, for instance).<br /><br />Also, is this a feeling you might want to question? Good times, good times, blah blah. That's excellent. But what about Larkin's "Reasons for Attendance"? Is there something fleeting, even phony about this connection everyone feels at Lucky's? Or, if it's an authentic feeling, is there some sadness that it can't last?<br /><br />That sort of complexity would bring this poem away from "story about college" territory into "story about living deeply" territory.<br /><br />Dave<br /><br />P.S. And, yeah, you have the opportunity to let your reader feel the way I feel when I fall in love with characters in a book or movie. Let us feel the crush as much as you can without telling us to feel it.Davehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03007804760439414596noreply@blogger.com